Sunday, September 23, 2007

PAGAN Repent - Updated

Sometimes when doing religious stewardship, I start to feel like a combination of Simon (the guy who carried Christ's cross. . and tell me this guy wasn't thinking "SHIT, I should have stay in the field with the goats") and that guy in the medieval torture press.

Every year that I teach these kids their Catholic education, it makes me dislike humanity a little more.

CLASS - FIRST DAY - Of my 8 or 9 students, 4 show up. Well, actually 5 showed up because one of the girls that wasn't there text messaged one of the girls actually IN the class. I pointed out that this did not count as attendance.

Starting off good.

On student transferred sight unseen, which left me with ONE BOY. I cannot deal with 7 uninterested 13/14 girls. I have a hard time dealing with the 15 that I have at home.

So there we are. . . me, the boy and three girls. I want to try and get the discussion started and let them run the class. (It's there last year).

Me: "So, who actually goes to Church."
Boy: "We go on Easter and Christmas"
Me: "That's it? Do your parents go to Church?"
(sound of crickets)
Me: "Why are they sending you here? I sounds like you parents wasted 8 years of your life!'
Tess (a girl that I taught in 5 grade CCD): " Don't you, like, need Confirmation to get married in the Church?"
Me: "Uhh, yeah! You also need to be an active member of the Church."
Girl A: Do you have to married in the Church? Where else would you get married?"
Me: "On the beach. At sea by the Captain of the boat. Jumping out of an air plane."

So the conversation continued. . . .

The kicker:

So after we discuss how these kids have been sent to religious education by parents who don't practice their faith, I decide to try something new.

"Okay, so you guys don't go to church, maybe that will change later. Does everyone believe in God and all this stuff you have been learning?"
3 out of 4 nods.

it turns out that I have 3 students that kinda believe this whole Catholic thing, but only on a non interference basis and 1 student who believes that when you die, you go into the ground and that's it. I have no idea where to even begin. I may just play Death Metal for an hour and a half each week.

Finally, the bright moment of the evening was when I told them that starting in January, they AND THEIR PARENTS were required to attend the 9:00AM Sunday Mass through April. Expressions = PRICELESS


At 2:38 PM, Blogger RT said...

You start with Matthew 1:1.


Welcome to my world. That's why I don't teach Sunday School anymore. (Well, that and I haven't been able to get my butt out of bed to go to church in a while--fatigue--not apathy.)

At 5:58 PM, Blogger Mrs Grim said...

Sounds like you have your work cut out for you. If you can reach one, it will be worth it.

At 9:47 PM, Blogger skywriter said...

I think there's still a nun at St. Joseph that has a 6 year old artist rendition of mine in crayon showing "Pontius Pilot" and he's driving a 737 with Jesus and the rest of the disciples in the back.

At 1:39 PM, Blogger qofd said...

First of all: I want skywriter to scan that picture and post it because honestly? I'm PMSing and I really need that to get through the day.

Secondly: This post cracked me up.

Thirdly: WTF with the parents who want their kids to receive a religious education without actually practicing the religion? My husband's best friend considers himself Catholic and sends their kids to private Catholic school yet hasn't set foot in a church in decades (not even to get married). It's just odd.

At 4:53 PM, Blogger Deathlok said...

I have no idea.

I actually had complaints by parents because their kids go home and tell them stuff that I say. They want to know why I am telling their kids that their parents aren't good Catholics.

I usually reply, "Well, if you haven't been to Church and haven't been to Confession, etc. . .technically, you are excommunicated, so your not really Catholic at all."

And yet still I haven't been fired.

Oh, and I also would like to request Skully's picture be posted.

At 11:33 PM, Blogger Captain America said...

I guess some parents have decided not to pursue their faith to the fullest for whatever reason.
They may still want their children brought up in that faith until they are someday ready to make the choice as to fully participate or not. Until that time they want the kids to fully participate. It is strange but I understand it on some level.

At 1:10 AM, Blogger Old NFO said...

Sounds like you have met the enemy and they are US... Religion and actual participation seem to be an anthema to kids today- They are too busy doing everything else BUT going to church.

At 10:21 AM, Anonymous linda said...

I think it's alittle odd that churches like Baptists and Methodists are calling their churches something else--Dawson Family of Faith was the Dawson Baptist Church. Not all of them do this but alot seem to. My roommate at college was Catholic and we had more late night discussions and neither of us gave an inch. She was considering becoming a nun and I just couldn't stand the idea.(She didn't)

At 10:34 PM, Blogger Deathlok said...

Cap, I kinda get what your sayin' but if you want to let your child (not you per se) let them explore their religious beliefs from an unskewed perspective. My wife and her brother weren't Baptized for just that reason.
Her Father was a nonpracticing Catholic and her Mother a nonpracticing. They each made their choice.

When I worked for Navy, I sat across from a Jewish guy and we had lots of interesting discussions on faith . . .and never comfrontational, always informative.

At 7:52 PM, Blogger zippychik said...

Q. "Do you have to married in the Church?"

Here's what you should have answered:
A. No, but if you want your parents to continue talking to you it would help.

At 9:30 AM, Blogger Deathlok said...

So "Shut up you heathen bastards" was not what I should have said?

At 1:14 PM, Anonymous linda said...

I think you need to explain "when I worked Navy" alittle!

And I should've said my roommate and I had many "lively" discussions but we never got mad at each other or went without speaking! She had to get permission from her priest to be in my wedding and there were alot of restrictions involved with being a Catholic. We're still friends and she lives in Harrisburg.

At 1:14 PM, Anonymous linda said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

At 5:44 PM, Blogger Deathlok said...

That's right! I worked the Navy. . .Nuff Said!

I wouldn't talk to your friend, but because she lives in Harrisburg.


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